Saturday, 3 February 2018

Glimpses into my Heart

I stand 
In the darkness
The street lamp throwing a spotlight on me.

I stand 
In the sunshine
The light filtering through the trees
Throwing a halo on me.

Through uncounted shared laughs
Knowing smiles, frank conversations, heated debates, partaken meals and long walks,
I let you see glimpses into my heart.
Unfettered, unrestrained, unchecked, unfiltered, uncensored glimpses.
Of who I am, what I want to be, what I could be.
My dreams, my aspirations, my fears.
What makes me happy, what ticks me off.
Something as trivial as my favourite drink of the season,
Or the color of my curtains at home.
Trivial, but important to me nonetheless.

Sometimes I think, wonder
Am I letting you see too much? 
Isn't it better to erect a wall, a barrier
And hold my innermost thoughts to my own?
The fear and the uncertainty of what you will do  
With this new found knowledge of me.
The scraps of information, the missing pieces to you
That will let you piece together the enigma of me.

Will you use this to allay my doubts, 
help me grow 
and make me stronger and better.
Or will you leverage all my weaknesses
And use it in ways that neither you nor I understand.

Do you know that at this point in time, at this stage in my life, in this part of the world
You are one of the handful of people that I spend a lot of my time with.
Many of my friends, the people that I've known, 

have been left behind in the past, 
separated by distance and time.
You, on the other, hand are here in my today, in my present.

So use your power wisely my friend.
When someone opens up to you,
Know that you are one of the few people that are interwoven into their current, their present.
In small ways maybe but connected nonetheless.
And privileged enough to let you see
Glimpses into their Heart.

Still from Evanescence "My Immortal", 2003